Editor’s Note: This was originally meant to be published last Thursday, but due to circumstances beyond my control, I’m just getting to publish this now. That being said…Let’s Go.
♦ Hell Hath No Fury…♦
“No Adultery is Bloodless”
DETROIT — As I wrote last week in my blog about Death, The Grim Reaper has been taking no prisoners. One of its most noteworthy victims, not named Michael Jackson, was former NFL quarterback Steve McNair. McNair was found dead in his condo in Nashville on July 4th. He’d been shot four times, twice in the chest and once in each temple …yikes! Also in the condo was the body of his 20-year-old mistress Sahel Kazemi, lying dead on the floor with a single gunshot to the head. It was later determined that it was Kazemi who killed McNair before turning the gun on herself. The death of McNair sent shockwaves through the country because his death was the 6th death of a high-profile individual in a month and knocked a large pause into the cheating hearts of a lot of men (and women) out here.
McNair first popped up on the sports radar in 1992 at Div I-AA HBCU Alcorn State. He still holds numerous college football records including the Division I-AA record for total offense with 16,283 yards, was drafted 3rd in 1995 by the Houston Oilers. McNair didn’t see any significant time until the team moved to Tennessee (first Memphis, then eventually Nashville) in 1997. McNair led the Oilers to a respectable 8-8 record (as a Detroit Lions fan, I only have vague memories of what an 8-8 team looks like…). He quickly developed a reputation as a tough quarterback with a strong arm who could do damage passing and rushing (Think of Michael Vick with a full skillset).
By 2000, the now-Titans were 13-3 and used the “Music City Miracle” to spark a run to Super Bowl XXXIV against the St. Louis Rams. Late in the 4th quarter, with the Titans down 23-16, McNair had driven the team to the Rams’ 10-yard-line with 6 seconds left (including one of the illest passes out of a sack ever). McNair hit wide receiver Kevin Dyson short of the goal line. Dyson was tackled by St. Louis linebacker Mike Jones (not THAT Mike Jones) at the 1-yard-line as time ran out giving the Rams the Championship in what was one of the greatest near-misses in the history of professional sports. The Titans never reached another Super Bowl, and McNair’s hardcore style started taking a toll on his body. McNair spent 4 more injury-riddled seasons in Nashville before finishing his career in Baltimore with the Ravens.
Aside from a 2002 DUI/Gun Possession arrest (the charges were eventually dropped), McNair was as close to a model citizen as you could get. He was well known in Nashville for his charitable work including his contributions to organizations such as Toys for Tots, The Boys & Girls Club, opening a restaurant near Tennessee State, and running football camps each summer that helped mostly underprivileged children. He was also nominated for the NFL Man of the Year award in 2005. He was married, had four sons (two of them from a relationship prior to his marriage) and was living the good life. On the Report Card of life, McNair was pulling a solid 3.8 GPA.
That’s what makes the rest of this blog difficult to write because as full of the WIN as this dude was, he was, in fact, a horrible husband, and in turn, a negligent father. It’s no secret, if you are a professional athlete in this country, you get more ass than a toilet seat in a bathroom at a Luke video shoot. But as the details of this particular tryst have come out, they lead one to believe that McNair was stunningly brazen in his infidelity.
He owned a condo in downtown Nashville, which I can guarantee you was nothing more than the spot where he would handle his business. After meeting the then-19-year-old Sahel Kazemi at Dave & Buster’s back in February (while with his family), he started a torrid affair with Kazemi that included him taking her on multiple trips, buying her a Cadillac Escalade for her 20th birthday (she had to make the payments on it…which contributed to the eventual breakdown), and apparently telling her family that he was in the final stages of divorcing his wife (which was news to everybody, considering he hadn’t even gotten separated from his wife). Add the lies and deception to the fact that this young woman was rather unstable and you just knew nothing good was going to come of this.
Kazemi suspected that she wasn’t the only side dish on McNair’s dinner menu, and had actually begun stalking who she assumed was the third-string girl. She had purchased a handgun less than a week before the murder and the day before had told a friend of hers that “My life is a ball of sh*t and I should end it.” (Nice work alerting authorities there homie, well, at least you weren’t a snitch!) Less than 36 hours later, Kazemi and McNair were dead. One murder, one suicide, 10,000 questions. In the aftermath of his death, people have been very quick to try to sweep the unpleasant circumstances that led to his untimely death under the rug, even talking about a married man being killed by his “girlfriend” as if the sh*t is normal. I refuse to do that.
Was this man a very charitable and dedicated individual? Yes. Was he a damn good athlete? Oh yeah. Was he a great man who I’d want my sons to emulate? Hell No. Did Steve McNair deserve to die for his sins? No. I have heard his affair referred to as a “mistake”. That, my friends, is bullsh*t. This was no mistake. He may have made a mistake in who he chose to mess around with, but the affair itself was not. He played with the lives of not just his wife and (at last count) two mistresses, but he also toyed with the lives of his children and the families of the women he was screwing around with. His friends aren’t without fault. I doubt that his closest friends had “no idea” he was messing around. That’s just the yarn dudes spin to cover their arse when the sh*t hits the fan. Hell, it was one of McNair’s closest friends who discovered the bodies, and he knew who Kazemi was.
No man or woman should die for committing adultery. However, his actions indirectly led to his demise. Had he just ordered dinner from that waitress, he may still be here right now. His wife (who I also believe knew he was doing something, but was simply oblivious to it) wouldn’t be forced to bury her cheating husband and listen to the sordid details of what he did in what turned out to be his final months. His sons wouldn’t be without a father, and we wouldn’t have to be subjected to another example of a high profile athlete messing around on his wife, this one with brutal consequences.
And before any of you guilty consciences try to pull the “Who are you to judge this man like you’re so damn perfect!?” card, I am a man who has ruined an incredible relationship with his own infidelity. I am no kindred spirit with Steve McNair, nor will I stick up for him and try to only highlight the positives because I was a cheating bastard like he was. He didn’t deserve to die, and the chick who killed him can rot in hell. However, let this be a lesson to every man (and woman) out there who is living foul. You never know what you’re getting yourself into out here. If you are gonna mess around, be careful. Better yet, if you are in a relationship or are Married, how about you honor your commitment and your vows or just get out altogether. Don’t get caught slippin’ out here because the fast life can end in a flash.
Thank You For Your Time, Take Care, God Bless, Always Dare To Be Different, and G.O.M.A.B. (ΦΒΣ/ΖΦΒ)!
Until Next Time…Beware of the Case of the Ex…Σ